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I’ll tell you what I’d do if I was in charge. First of all I’d tell Rooney to fuck off. You’re a muppet and you’re no good any more - fuck off back to old trafford and shag a granny you bald wanker. Then I’d shove in that rickie lambert fella - propa Englishman him - and I’d tell Adam lama…Adam lallama…that Southampton geezer to put the ball in the box onto lambert’s ‘ed and he can stick it in the net. Now, I wouldn’t play this continental system - you wanna play your 4-4-2 and I’d go to Paul scholes and I’d say - now I know you’re fucking old mate, but you’re still fucking quality and your country needs you. Wham bang - we’d beat Uruguay like that, get a draw of them Italians - cos they’re still crafty - and we’d whallop Costa Rica or cosa Nostra, whatever they’re called. Then we’d beat whoever we face in the second round and quarters - the Germans in the semis - on penalties - then in the final we’d smack the shit out of Argentina like we did in the Falklands, win the fahkin World Cup.

—via an Englishman in New York: “I can guarantee you that up and down the country of my birth this evening [which was the evening of June 19), following England’s defeat [by Uruguay] this monologue was given by some fat, beer swilling tattooed up guy: (for the sake of it, read it in Ray Winstone’s voice but the accent will change depending on the city”

meninblazers:

Papers in Argentina celebrate advancing to the final courtesy of the “Hands of God.” Meanwhile, even Dutch front pages shed a tear for the Oranje. 

via a remembrance of the just-departed Real Madrid legend, “Alfredo di Stéfano was one of football’s true trailblazers”:

As the architect of the Ajax revolution in the late 1960s and early 70s Rinus Michels is widely credited with inventing total football but the Blond Arrow had begun playing it two decades earlier. Attack, defence, goalscoring, goal prevention, goal creation and joining up the midfield dots, Di Stéfano could do it all…

via a remembrance of the just-departed Real Madrid legend, “Alfredo di Stéfano was one of football’s true trailblazers”:

As the architect of the Ajax revolution in the late 1960s and early 70s Rinus Michels is widely credited with inventing total football but the Blond Arrow had begun playing it two decades earlier. Attack, defence, goalscoring, goal prevention, goal creation and joining up the midfield dots, Di Stéfano could do it all…

via Marca: #LaPortada con la que rendimos nuestro particular homenaje a Di Stéfano #EternoDiStéfano”

via Marca: #LaPortada con la que rendimos nuestro particular homenaje a Di Stéfano #EternoDiStéfano”

meninblazers:

"Humiliation" and "fiasco" are two words the Brazilian press is using to describe yesterday’s game. Meanwhile, German headlines celebrate the team’s move the World Cup Final.

via wnyc:

This sad Brazilian fan was shown crying. But no ones published this beautiful picture of him handing the trophy to a German fan. He was quoted as saying "Take it to the final! As you can see, it is not easy, but you deserve it, congratulations" (Roughly translated)
via

via wnyc:

This sad Brazilian fan was shown crying. But no ones published this beautiful picture of him handing the trophy to a German fan. He was quoted as saying "Take it to the final! As you can see, it is not easy, but you deserve it, congratulations" (Roughly translated)

via

via afootballreport:

As We Watch Brazil’s Dance

By Anthony Lopopolo

In the beginning of Dave Zirin’s book, Brazil’s Dance with the Devil, one of America’s pre-eminent political sports writers tells us that he simply had to write a book about Brazil – a country, said one of his professors, that is certainly not for “beginners.” But Zirin is no beginner. He is the voice of reason in a country of unreasonable disparity.

He first starts in the favelas, one of them surrounding Rio’s Maracana, where hundreds of homes, once built by generations of families, were “cracked open.” Those residents were relocated, some moved hours away, some getting no compensation at all.

Zirin then interviews journalists and academics, street sweepers and the indigenous peoples, as he searches for the meaning behind everything that has happened in Brazil over the past year. His latest book is an essential companion for this month. It examines what it means to be Brazilian and explains why FIFA is exploiting the land like its colonizers from Portugal so many years ago.

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Every World Cup does one thing better than any other event that human beings organize. It focuses the attention of the world on one place at one moment. Around a billion people watched at least part of the final in 2010; that’s several Super Bowls. When a game becomes so ubiquitous, it almost ceases to be entertainment and becomes something else, an atmospheric phenomenon, an object of astronomy. Will more people watch Germany-France on Friday or see the moon over France and Germany? Only the Olympics brings people together like this, and hey, due respect to the Olympics. But oh man is it ever not the same thing.

And this, even more than neuron-blowing games or unbelievable outcomes, is the magic of the World Cup. Over the next 10 days, a substantial portion of the living population of the Earth will have its feelings altered simultaneously by the actions of 22 men chasing a ball around a field in Brazil. Whether you watch alone or in a group or at a stadium, you will know that what you are seeing is being seen by hundreds of millions of people on every corner of the globe, and that your joy, despair, or disbelief is being echoed in incomprehensibly many consciousnesses. Is there anything more ridiculous than this? There is nothing more ridiculous than this, but it’s an extraordinary feeling, too. When something incredible happens — Messi curls a ball around three defenders; Zidane head-butts Materazzi — it’s not just an exciting moment. It’s a bright line connecting you with the human race.

No other sporting event can really compare to the World Cup in this regard, and when the tournament is as wild as this one has been, the feeling is even stronger. It’s why you despair that FIFA is a cabal of oleaginous quasi murderers, why their inability to control, say, match fixing is so depressing. They don’t deserve to control this. In an important sense, it has nothing to do with them. No World Cup, certainly not one in Brazil, can stand outside history. The World Cup is history. And now it’s history waiting to happen.

—Brian Phillips’s latest WC column for Grantland, posted last Thursday before the quarterfinals began: “Stop Making Sense: Looking back, looking forward, and going crazy for the World Cup

via meninblazers:

Headlines in Brazil and Germany talk of advancing to the semifinals. Meanwhile, Colombian and French papers say “thank you” and “farewell.”